When I was younger I genuinely believed I was going to be an amazing old lady. Now that I am getting older, I have to wonder what on earth I was thinking. I kind of had the feeling, a bit like popping a load of washing in the machine and it comes out clean, well, I thought I would go through life and come out fabulous. The reality as I'm discovering, is not quite like that. In fact, I have a sinking suspicion it might be heading the other way!

Life coaches spend a lot of time talking about taking responsibility for your life, you know the "If it's to be, it is up to me" sort of thing. Which is all fine and well, and don’t get me wrong, it's excellent advice, it's just that putting it into practice is pretty darn hard. How many of us plan our year, never mind have a five year plan for the future? Generally speaking, it's often more of a hit and miss type scenario. We may have a vague idea of where we want to be, but life keeps happening and so we meander along enjoying the view or not, as the case may be.

The bottom line is that even when we know something is really, really bad for us, it's extremely difficult to not do it. And we all have our own personal weak spot, food, alcohol, shopping, TV games, etc. that has us behaving in ways that would disappoint both our younger and older self.

Taking responsibility for our lives is a very onerous task, it involves stopping the blame and justification we use to explain why it is not our fault our life is a mess. It takes courage and discipline to deal with the flawed and astonishing beings we really are. Somehow as we learn to accept all of who we are, the good and the bad, it becomes slightly easier to accept the future as it is.

Ultimately, to know what our future holds, all we have to do is take a good look at how we are right now. If we feel jaded, overwhelmed, hard done by and resentful, our future is likely to be more of the same. If we feel loved, fulfilled, worthwhile, enthusiastic and connected, the choices we make bring more of that to our lives. The question is, what choices are you making?