The question is simple, is what I am doing making me happy? Answering it however, is not! In fact it opens up a can of worms that, honestly, most of us would really rather not think about. In order to change something that we are unhappy with in our life there is a critical first step. We have to admit to ourselves that our life or an aspect of our life is not how we want it to be. "What me? Not coping? Don’t be ridiculous." my inner perfectionist grumbles in the background!

Sadly, the truth of the matter is that if we are going to make a change, and it doesn't matter what area of your life needs some attention: health, weight loss, taxes, procrastination, or too much on your plate, we have to start by truly deeply wanting to change. Otherwise you can read every self help book or article ever written, agree wholeheartedly but never take the steps needed to actually make the change.

Luckily, we have the most powerful resource to help freely available right within ourselves. One that if we allow it, will help us become far more amazing than we can comprehend right now. This resource is our own mind! However, to tap into and harness its power is a bit like, well… trying to ride a wild horse, or cage an untamed monkey. Marching up and giving yourself a piece of your mind won't work, for obvious reasons! Instead skill is needed, we have to get very clever, learn to become 'mind whisperers' to start getting the best out of ourselves.

One way to do that is to start building trust by gently and kindly asking the question, "Is what I am doing making me happy? Is it making the people around me happy?" Then, and this bit is important so please don’t forget to do it, you need to answer the question! Take five minutes before you go to bed at night to reflect on your day: what went well, what you can do better next time and what would be better not done at all? We have spent years doing things that harm us in the mistaken belief they will make us happy. By spending a few minutes of quality time with yourself, you create the space to discover what is meaningful to your life and what isn't.