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Monday, 03 March 2014 17:46

What's your Story?

By dawn he had surrendered, gratefully, to the old inertia,
the product of always seeing both sides of every question.
Robert Harris    

The other day I was singing along to One Direction's 'Story of my Life' and it got me thinking about the story of my own life. We all have one, that thing we tell ourselves over and over again. Here's what I mean.

I decided to bake gluten-free muffins and found a recipe using coconut flour and grapeseed oil. Sounds simple enough, and it was until I started over-thinking things and inadvertently opened a nutritional Pandora's Box. First up, the Blood Type diet tells me to avoid all things coconut, not great for gluten-free baking as coconut flour is used in many recipes. Almond flour is an alternative which sounds delicious, but unfortunately is a goitrogen and not a good choice for thyroid problems. Nor is soya flour which is added to many gluten-free products and is a definite no-no for Hashimoto's.

I haven't even started on grapeseed oil yet! Canola is the new bad boy of cooking oil while grapeseed is being hailed as the healthy high heat alternative. Or so it seemed until I Googled and discovered grapeseed oil is high in Omega 6 and polyunsaturated fatty acid and should be avoided. By this stage my head was spinning and I felt like a ping pong ball. All I wanted is for someone to just tell me what to do.

And that dear readers, is the story of my life. I tell myself that I don't know what's best for me and that I need someone else to tell me how to live my life. Hoo boy! As anyone who has ever Googled something, or asked more than one person for an opinion knows, for every person who tells you one thing, five people will disagree, usually vehemently.

At the end of the day, each and every one of us has to take responsibility for our own lives. It's the old, 'If it's to be, it's up to me!' Ultimately it is our decision how we respond to what happens. When things go wrong we can choose to collapse in a helpless heap or we can choose a course of action and give it our best shot. There are amazing stories of people overcoming incredible obstacles for all sorts of crazy reasons. It starts by uncovering the story we tell ourselves, the one that is holding us back, making us smaller than we truly are. So what's your story?
Monday, 17 February 2014 10:32

The Art of Allowing!

Does "anal-retentive" have a hyphen?
Alison Bechdel

You know those chilled, slightly chaotic people who just let things happen? Well, I'm not one of them. I am a planner. I think everything through from every possible angle and am always, always prepared. For example, one day, for some obscure reason, someone needed a fork. For what I can’t recall, but they asked if I by any chance had one. And it just so happened I did have one... IN MY HANDBAG! Enough said.

So having ‘allowing’ as one of my three words for the year is a mammoth challenge and it's not going too well. The problem is in my approach, I want to figure out exactly what I have to do to allow things to be. It's hard to resist the urge to Google relaxation, make a list of required tasks and schedule it into my day. And herein lies the problem, because being and doing are entirely different.

While it's true that changing the habits of a lifetime takes time and effort, that is only part of the story and not the most important part. Over the years, I have done many breathing and relaxation exercises while mentally drumming my fingers or making wild plans in my head. Although I am putting time and effort into something, my body is doing one thing while my mind is doing quite another.

Allowing is more about a change in attitude, it's bridging the the gap between body and mind. It starts with acceptance and cultivating the capacity to be still and present without moving towards or away from our experience. To open up to life in all it’s glorious horror takes trust and courage. Sitting with a feeling without doing something, anything to make it less, or more or something else, is contrary to every instinct we have. We tend to want to hold on to the good and make the bad go away, and this deep seated attachment and aversion is the root of our troubles.

There is a magic to feeling our feelings fully, allowing our experience to be what it is, and it's one worth exploring in your own life. Remember it is about self acceptance, not self-improvement! Start small with daily occurrences, be late if you are, eat when you are hungry not because it's lunch time, rest when you are tired, and laugh out loud when you feel like it. Most importantly, just be your lovely self!
Friday, 31 January 2014 08:40

The Hero Inside

To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else, is the greatest accomplishment.
 Ralph Waldo Emerson

When I started down the road of personal growth, I was fully expecting a Fairy Tale. You know, girl meets her fabulous self, falls in love with her brilliant qualities and lives happily ever after. Seriously, I had no idea! The first inkling things weren't going as planned was when I discovered shame, anger and plain laziness ruling the roost. Instead of loving myself, I was finding it awfully hard to even like myself. Of course the only solution was to grit my teeth and strive harder to get rid of all the bad bits or failing that, to deny, deny, deny they were there at all. Anyhoo, to cut a long story short, that didn’t go so well.

Ultimately, I discovered it is very hard to be yourself when most of the time you are trying to be someone else. When things aren't how we like them, we have a tendency to fly off in our heads and try to magic it away through sheer mental effort. When reality isn't moulding itself to our expectations, it's easy to unwittingly create a self-fulfilling prophecy of frustration and disappointment with ourself and our life. We blame and justify, pretend and deny and it's a difficult dynamic to break. The unhappier we are the more we try to change and the tighter and more tense we get. This tension makes it harder to make that call, lose that weight, and generally motivate ourselves to do what we know we need to do.

Sometimes when we mess up so badly, at that point when we can no longer pretend we are holding it together, we start seeing what we are really made of. Neither frog nor prince, we are simply a person doing their best in a world where things don’t always go as hoped. If you take a deep breath and show up in spite of everything, if you hold your seat as your emotions rage, you start getting to know who you are underneath the surface.

This is the work of coaching, it is it about learning who you are and that you are stronger than you think. Knowing this, achieving goals becomes not only possible, but likely. So when everything is falling apart, when our dreams and hopes collapse, we begin to see that all that is left to save us is the hero inside. Remember that hero is you.
Tuesday, 14 January 2014 13:19

Goodness! My Bad…

Few are those who see with their own eyes and feel with their own hearts.
Albert Einstein

Recently I’ve experienced an unbroken run of blog posts with typing errors, a letter here, a word there… and let’s not talk about my grammar or eek, punctuation. I am mortified by the whole sorry state of affairs! Why, oh why can I not see my own mistakes? Maybe now is a good time to apologise for my errors and let you know that I am so on to it. Google has some very clever tips for spotting your own mistakes and I’ve also roped my long- suffering husband (his description!) into spell checking for me.

That said, not seeing your own mistakes is actually a very interesting phenomenon. It points to a deeper truth that the way we see the world is not necessarily an accurate reflection of the world we are seeing. Most of us are familiar with visual blind spots when driving (or typing in my case), but we also have psychological blind spots that colour our world and profoundly influence our experience.

Basically there are aspects of our personalities that are obvious to everyone but ourselves. How extraordinary that we can hide parts of our self, from our very own self!  But here is where it starts to get seriously freaky, if we aren’t able to see ourselves clearly, it does not bode well for how clearly we are able to see others, now does it?

If you have a strong reaction to someone, either good or bad, there is a good chance you are attributing things you don’t like or can’t accept about yourself on to someone else. It’s a nifty little move that conveniently deflects the problem away from you in the short term, but holds you back in ways you cannot imagine in the long term. The bottom line is that whether you are madly in love with someone or gnashing your teeth in frustration, chances are, if you are having a strong reaction, it has more to do with you than with them.

So my two cents worth, is get to know yourself, all of you, the good, the bad and the ugly. Get curious. When you are having a strong reaction to someone, wonder why? Why am I so affected by this? What is going on in me? The more we learn to love and accept ourselves the more we are able to love and accept others. Try it, it will change your world!
Monday, 30 December 2013 18:59

Happy New Year!

Tomorrow is the first blank page of a 365 page book. Write a good one.
 Brad Paisley

This is very ‘uncool’ but I absolutely adore making New Year’s resolutions! There is something about the beginning of a year that fills me with hope, enthusiasm and a dogged determination to do it differently. I get inspired to eat better, lose weight, exercise more and generally upgrade my existence and I’m happy to use any motivation, no matter how short lived, to make it happen.

The speed with which we are bombarded by life makes it hard to stay on track and setting a clear intention is a great help in keeping us going in the direction we want to. It’s easy to be full of good ideas about how fabulous we are going to be in the coming year when we are on holiday, well-rested and feeling the effects of our over indulgence. However, when it comes to implementing these great ideas, many of us fall short.

Years ago I came across a lovely idea of choosing three words to focus on for the year. They serve as a guideline reminding us what is important in the busy chaos of life. If you have plans for 2014, I would love to hear them so please share your resolutions or three words in the comments section below. Many a goal has been achieved through sheer pride or competitiveness and hey, if going public works, why not! Another thing that does wonders is putting a daily reminder on your cell phone. It helps stop the surreptitious slide into bad habits that seems to happen just outside our awareness.

So here it goes, my three words for 2014 are sacredness, allowing and care.
Sacredness is about remembering the preciousness of life. It is taking a moment to notice the trees, the sunlight, the breeze, to enjoy being alive while doing a simple chore like walking the dogs.
Allowing is to stop striving and trying so hard. I want to learn to leave things be and cultivate being at ease with what is happening, whatever that may be.
Care is about taking time, being careful rather than careless with what is important. It is valuing and appreciating things like health and wellness, the environment, connecting with the many dear friends I am slowly losing touch with through simply being too busy.

Make 2014 your best year ever! I hope you have a very Happy New Year and remember to take care.
Thursday, 19 December 2013 18:44

The Trouble with Abundance

Riches are not from abundance of worldly goods, but from a contented mind.
Unknown


With Christmas around the corner, it reminded me of a year-end function I attended a few years ago. We were given flattish black stones and beautiful pens and invited to write words on the stones reflecting what we most wanted to attract into our lives in the New Year. Some people chose a variety of stones of different shapes and sizes and wrote four or five words along the lines of love, success, wealth, and happiness. I chose one stone and wrote one word on it, abundance!

In most contexts, abundance is associated with plentifulness and that was what I was aiming at, a sense of having more than enough, an abundance. Of course that leads to the question, what is enough? Often this rather critical point has not been discussed with ourselves. The recent retreat I completed was done at a place without electricity. Before I went, I was concerned whether there would be enough solar light to meet my needs in the evenings.

And this is where the trouble with abundance starts, the moment we start defining enough. Is it enough to see clearly at night? To read? What exactly is sufficient light? Ample light? When is enough, enough? The idea we have of what will be enough is often quite different to the reality of what we need to meet our needs, be it food, clothing money, or in my case, light. The problem is that when our wish for abundance is coming from a sense of lack within us, or a feeling of scarcity, nothing is ever going to be quite enough.

In the hope that it would help, two months before I left for retreat I started 50- Days of Cultivating Contentment on my Soul Sense Coaching's Facebook Page. It was a nightmare, I struggled for ages every evening to find two or three things I was content with that didn’t involve something I had done, eaten or bought!

Over the 50 days I learnt that genuine abundance comes from a contented mind that can appreciate good in the midst of bad. The sun that still shines even when you are reeling from bad news, the smile of a stranger, a cool breeze, a hug when you need it most, the joy of giving, of being there for someone and most importantly, the peace that comes from knowing who you are and that you are enough.  

I would like to take a moment to thank everyone who has been reading my blog throughout the year for your support. It is greatly appreciated.
May you have a wonderful Christmas and may the New Year be filled with peace, love and happiness.
Sunday, 08 December 2013 17:09

From the Inside Out

May it be a light to you in dark places, when all other lights go out.
 J.R.R. Tolkien, The Fellowship of the Ring


A few years ago I arrived home after almost six weeks away to a non-functional computer and a blog post that seriously missed its deadline. Our elderly dog, who has since died, climbed under my desk, knocked the computer box over in panic during a thunderstorm and damaged my hard drive. It was not pretty!

Then in the same week, Nelson Mandela died. My first thought was that a light had gone out in the world. It got me thinking about how one remarkable human being managed to impact the world by being who he was. In the most incredibly circumstances, Nelson Mandela found a way to love and keeping loving and in return was genuinely loved by so many. It is an extraordinary accomplishment from a truly great human being.

Not all of us are able to change the world in such a vast way but each and every one of us has the capacity to change our life and benefit people close to us. There are many different kinds of love and many ways to love, but the essence of love is beyond that, it is universal. Love sometimes catches us unaware, a moment sneaks up and before we know it we feel connected and expansive and part of something so much greater than just ourselves.

The funny thing is that it is not always easy to love, even when we actually do! Husbands, children, family and friends, while we often adore them, have a way of driving us absolutely nuts with frustration. Life throws challenges at us that drain our spirits and knock us off balance. We get hurt, shut down and gradually our capacity for love withers and fades.

In my heart of hearts I firmly believe that no matter what, the spark inside of us never dies. As long as we have life, we can love. Sometimes we have to dig deep to remember. We have to use every tool in our tool kit to remind ourselves that when everything else is taken away, our capacity to love remains. It is love that takes us beyond ourselves, that guides us to see the world at large and to remember the greater good.

We recently celebrated Mandela Day and in honour of Nelson Mandela's life, I pledge to cultivate the spark of love inside me on a daily basis, to do my utmost to help where help is needed and to live wholeheartedly to the very best of my ability. What are you going to pledge?
Wednesday, 13 November 2013 00:00

Guilty Motivation

When a resolute young fellow steps up to the great bully, the world, and takes him boldly by the beard, he is often surprised to find it comes off in his hand, and that it was only tied on to scare away the timid adventurers.
Ralph Waldo Emerson

What makes you do the things you do? According to ancient lore, humans are driven by two very powerful urges, one that has us moving, or running if necessary, from anything that might cause us pain, and one that has us skipping happily towards pleasure. It comes from way back, something to do with sabre-toothed tigers trying to eat us and other kinds of pleasure to um, well…. er propagate the species and ensure survival and all of that.

That said, something fairly interesting is going on here in the modern world. People are getting up to some seriously odd things and it makes me wonder why? Of course wondering about other people's craziness has an unfortunate way of leading right back to me and what motivation I could possibly have for doing what I just did.

Many of the so-called good things we do come from a not-so-nice place inside of us. When we look a bit deeper, we find we are often driven by avoidance. Our niceness is a front, a trick we play to not feel guilty or look bad, or to avoid failure or feeling shame. We bully ourselves into action and end up in a double bind unable to tell if we have done a good thing or a bad thing.

To add to our confusion, we do bad things but convince ourselves it is coming from a good place. We tell people off for their own good, punish our children to get the best out of them and shout at people we disagree with in the hope it will make them think like us. How can I put this nicely? "Okay, seriously dude, there is a fatal flaw in this programme!'

Motivation is everything. It is not so much what we do but why we do it that matters. To know your motivation, check what kind of a heart you have before you act. A guilty or resentful heart is a clue that what we are about to do is not in the best interests of ourselves or others. A heart brimming with love and kindness means there is a good chance that we will do what is necessary with gentleness and skill.

If you are bullying yourself with guilt, step up boldly, yank its false beard and start doing what not only feels right, but is good for you and others.
Tuesday, 29 October 2013 00:00

The Garden of Your Mind

Don't judge each day by the harvest you reap but by the seeds that you plant.
Robert Louis Stevenson

What is going on in the garden of your mind? Is your attention going on weeds or flowers? I am no gardener, dirt and worms are seriously not my thing, but even I know that feeding and cultivating weeds is not the way to get rid of them. So I have to wonder why that is exactly what I do with the negative thoughts and emotions that arise when things aren’t going well in my life.

Most of us would rather clean out cupboards or do a dreaded body detox than tackle some of the less than helpful thoughts racing around our heads and yet that where the solution lies. The other day I caught myself in the act of huffing and puffing at a very incompetent and inconsiderate driver who didn't yield at a yield sign and then had to cheek to look at me funny. I tell you I was outraged!

To back -up a step, I was having an awful week. I had recently heard tragic news of the death of a dear friend and over the next few days, any small thing that went wrong added to the upset I was already feeling. It also explains how I went from calling a fallible, fellow driver names to hating the world in three short steps. Sadly this often happens when we hit a rough patch in life. Without realising it, we feed and water the weeds and end up fanning the flames of our upset into a raging forest fire in our minds.

Facing difficulties is part of life and while in the midst of tragedy or heartache is not the time to start learning to be more positive. We need to start planting the seeds now, in our daily life. Take a look at whether what you are thinking is helping or harming yourself and others. Calming ourselves when we are angry, comforting ourselves when we are sad, being kind when we mess up are all ways of planting seeds of positivity in our minds.

The best bit is that the more beautiful the garden of our mind is, simply being around us brings joy and comfort to those near us. So roll up your sleeves, dig up some dirt and give your thoughts a clean out. By not feeding what isn't helpful, we plant the seeds of a happier world in the garden of our own mind.
Tuesday, 15 October 2013 15:15

What the Future Holds…

Most of us can read the writing on the wall; we just assume it's addressed to someone else.
Ivern Ball

When I was younger I genuinely believed I was going to be an amazing old lady. Now that I am getting older, I have to wonder what on earth I was thinking. I kind of had the feeling, a bit like popping a load of washing in the machine and it comes out clean, well, I thought I would go through life and come out fabulous. The reality as I'm discovering, is not quite like that. In fact, I have a sinking suspicion it might be heading the other way!

Life coaches spend a lot of time talking about taking responsibility for your life, you know the "If it's to be, it is up to me" sort of thing. Which is all fine and well, and don’t get me wrong, it's excellent advice, it's just that putting it into practice is pretty darn hard. How many of us plan our year, never mind have a five year plan for the future? Generally speaking, it's often more of a hit and miss type scenario. We may have a vague idea of where we want to be, but life keeps happening and so we meander along enjoying the view or not, as the case may be.

The bottom line is that even when we know something is really, really bad for us, it's extremely difficult to not do it. And we all have our own personal weak spot, food, alcohol, shopping, TV games, etc. that has us behaving in ways that would disappoint both our younger and older self.

Taking responsibility for our lives is a very onerous task, it involves stopping the blame and justification we use to explain why it is not our fault our life is a mess. It takes courage and discipline to deal with the flawed and astonishing beings we really are. Somehow as we learn to accept all of who we are, the good and the bad, it becomes slightly easier to accept the future as it is.

Ultimately, to know what our future holds, all we have to do is take a good look at how we are right now. If we feel jaded, overwhelmed, hard done by and resentful, our future is likely to be more of the same. If we feel loved, fulfilled, worthwhile, enthusiastic and connected, the choices we make bring more of that to our lives. The question is, what choices are you making?
Tuesday, 01 October 2013 18:16

Decisions, Decisions

Alice came to a fork in the road, 'Which road do I take?' she asked.
'Where do you want to go?' responded the Cheshire Cat.
'I don't know,' Alice answered.
'Then,' said the Cat, 'it doesn't matter.”
Lewis Carroll, Alice in Wonderland

Ever found yourself tossing a coin to help make a major decision in your life? Best of three, maybe? I certainly have and on more than one occasion. My mom clued me in on this lovely little shortcut many years ago. In her 'crazy wisdom' sort of way, she reckoned that in that split second as the coin is falling, you find yourself screeching internally, "Please be heads, please be heads, please be heads" and voilá, your decision is made!

There are some very lucky / annoying people in the world who seem to know exactly what they want. They get out there, follow their inner compass and achieve all sorts of wonderful things. Unfortunately, the rest of us are a bit more like Alice in the quote above. We come to a crossroad in life and find ourselves scratching our heads wondering how on earth we are meant to know which way we want to go.

So how do we start uncovering what it is we really want?  Years ago I read an article on decision making in which the author suggested three things: Ask yourself, does this action take me in the direction I want to go? Contemplate your options and certainty will arise, and finally, having made a decision don’t look back. At the time I was like ja, no, well, right, if I could do that I wouldn’t be stuck! Sadly, I can't remember the author's name but what he said next made a lasting impact. He said that by not looking back and doubting your choices, you start to build trust in your ability to make good decisions. It becomes a self fulfilling prophecy and over time you get better and better at it.

Self-doubt is crippling. By constantly questioning ourselves and our abilities we shrink our world and forget what amazing creatures we actually are. We are capable of achieving so much but only if we believe it is possible. After years of doubting yourself, it takes time to build trust and start allowing the voice of your dreams, (you know, the one you usually tell to shush) to come back to life. Living with enthusiasm is a choice, it is a decision you make and keep making through out the day, every day. It's not an easy journey but it is one, I hope you choose to make.
Monday, 16 September 2013 09:53

When Enough is Too Much!

Contentment consists not in adding more fuel, but in taking away some fire.
Thomas Fuller

These days life is pretty busy for most of us and one thing I have discovered, is that efficiency can be both a blessing and a curse. To toot my own horn, I must admit I am very, very good at getting things done. I put those five minute gaps that happen during the day to good use. While the kettle is boiling, I unpack the dishwasher, I plan my week, make shopping lists and gosh, talking about it like this, someone give me a Noddy Badge for totally succeeding in getting the most out of my day!

However, there is a fine line between efficiency and relentless perfectionism and I suspect I am on the slippery slope to overwhelm. The harder I work, the more scattered I get and the unfortunate consequence of this, is a clumsy carelessness. Those of you following me on Facebook will know some of what I get up to and it's not pretty!

At times like this, there is a strong tendency to try harder, like Avis. Now, while it might work in advertising and for car hire, it is definitely not working for me. No matter how much I have or do in a day, it is never enough. The demands on my time and energy never stop and nor does my desire for more. One mug isn't enough, I simply must have that fabulous polka dot set from Woolworths…and best I get eight just in case… or maybe ten, so if some break…. Well, you get my drift.  

The way to tackle this is not to stop the world or to ban yourself from Woolies indefinitely. It starts with us, our way of approaching our lives and relating to our desires has to change. Instead of satisfying every urge, start cultivating contentment, that feeling of being happy with what you have and feeling that what you have is enough. Fiddle with the habit of wanting, because if we look carefully at our lives, we can see there is no end to our wanting. So start where we are, with the problem which is our wanting, and not with what it is we want.

For a moment close your eyes and imagine being completely happy with your life… yourself… your partner… your kids… your job… your bank balance. How would it feel to be so utterly at ease, so wholly at peace? This is the feeling we need to cultivate.
Monday, 02 September 2013 00:00

Happy Smiley People!

Sometimes your joy is the source of your smile, but sometimes your smile can be the source of your joy.
Thich Nhat Hanh

Many years ago, I got a bee in my bonnet to do a three month meditation retreat on Holy Island in Scotland. At the time I was living about two hours drive from Johannesburg and one day while in Joburg, I popped in at a travel agent to price air tickets to start saving for the trip. Some sort of instant karma kicked in, and two days later, I arrived, or should I say staggered, on to Holy Island, wondering 'what the bleep' just happened.

That first week was one of the toughest of my life. I arrived the day the group of retreatants decided to spend a week in silence. I was exhausted, shell-shocked, completely disorientated and way, way out of my depth. Being silent adds to the intensity of …well, everything and one day it all got on top of me. I fled my room hoping to out run my mind (which by the way, doesn’t seem possible), or the very least, escape myself for a bit. I'm digressing but please bear with me, there is a point to this little tale and it is coming soon!

Holy Island is a tiny, very beautiful island, natural, untouched and dedicated to World Peace. Simply being there restores and rejuvenates body and mind. Unfortunately, at the time I was too distraught to appreciate any of those qualities. I will never forget what happened next. There I was, standing in this magnificent place, feeling trapped and frantic when a monk walked past. We never spoke a word, but as he passed by, he smiled a warm and genuine smile right at me and it changed everything.

There are times when a smile can save your life, it brings light and warmth to dark places and reminds you of good things you may have forgotten. It is easy to underestimate the power of an open- hearted smile when words fail us.

Your homework for this week, and you can ask my clients, I am very strict about homework so you have to do it because I said so! Everyday this week make an effort to smile at someone who needs it. It doesn't matter if it is a stranger or a friend, open your heart and beam your best smile at them. The thing about smiling is that it's infectious and utterly irresistible. So off you go, get on out there and start smiling.  

Thursday, 15 August 2013 14:12

A Sense of Adventure

It is not given to us to know what difference we can make, and perhaps we can make no difference at all. But that is no reason not to make the attempt," said Saliman quietly. "The Light shines more brightly in the darkness.
 Alison Croggon, The Crow

Do you remember the days when you'd be counting sleeps to some exciting event? It didn’t matter what it was, a birthday party, Christmas, or simply a tooth falling but you'd be busting out your skin with 'Donkey-like-are-we-there-yet' impatience. Sadly, as I've got older the only things keeping me awake at night are stress and worries. It makes me wonder what happened to that overwhelming exuberance. Where did it go? And is the joy still there?  

Curiosity is an amazing thing, it has children eating sand and bugs and driving you mad with why questions and is something we easily outgrow. The more experience we have, the more certain we become and the less time we take to explore and discover why something is like it is. We start skipping the step of actual experience and go straight to the mental computation of what we expect to happen, from either our own, or someone else's past experience.

The truth is that no two people or two situations are alike, similar maybe, but identical? No. When we start engaging with our life with a sense of adventure, a childlike curiosity, it changes. In Zen Buddhism it's called Beginner's Mind. It is having an attitude of openness, eagerness, and lack of preconceptions when studying a subject. In coaching, that subject is you.

It is a fascinating process to spend time with yourself asking quality questions like the good old fashioned 'Why?'  Why on earth am I doing what I do, thinking what I think and saying what I say? The moment we get curious about ourselves and our life and start poking around in the dirt, so to speak, it changes everything. Sometimes, hidden within the muck of past failures and fears, or fortress like defences and sadness, we find the shining light of acceptance and kindness, our jewel of joy. This is the beauty of getting to know yourself, of living in the moment and paying attention to important things like your breath and the little moments that make life worth living.

It is a journey worth making. One that frees you from old habits that are no longer relevant. For the next few days make an effort to cultivate a sense of adventure, play with your world, do something differently, speak up if you are shy, stay silent if you are a chatterbox. Wonder, instead of decide what will happen and watch yourself to come back to life.
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