Wednesday, 15 March 2017 10:30

Fear of Missing Out!

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When you fear missing out, you are missing the moment.
Styling the Inside

This year I've been on a mission to say YES to unexpected opportunities. It was going well until yesterday's FOMO (fear of missing out) experience! Some friends who live across country were visiting the St Lucia Wetlands. It’s less than an hour away from us and we arranged to meet at Monzi Golf Course. Although I’m no golfer, I decided to go along. There’s a fabulous Craft & Coffee Shop at the golf course and it sounded like a nice outing for the day.

We were in the car about to leave, when a message arrived confirming arrangements I’d made for that very same morning. My bad! I’d completely forgotten that a Horse Whisperer was coming to Richard’s Bay to work with a friend’s horse.

Here’s the low down, golf is soooo not my thing, too hot, too long, too boring, but horses, ... ah now that’s the stuff my dreams and happy memories are made of. And a Horse Whisperer in Richards Bay? That’s a small miracle in itself. Never mind FOMO, this was COMO; Certainty of Missing Out! I had to make an instant decision and with a heartfelt sigh, I chose golf.

Life is full of moments like this. We are asked to choose one course of action over another and it can be hard to know what to do. Once we’ve chosen, we still have to deal with the emotional backlash from our decision, be it regret, disappointment or having to let go of a hoped for ideal.

 Life Coaching offers some useful tips for grappling with these kinds of choices:
1) Flex your gratitude muscle. Remind yourself how fortunate you are to have choices. A burst of positivity may be just what you need to regain perspective.
2) Bring creative problem-solving to the table. Is there a way to make this work for everyone involved? If not, see option four.
3) Take a longer term perspective. Which option will bring the most peace of mind over the long term?
4) Breathe. Sometimes we have a hard choice to make and simply have to breathe through the emotions. We are being asked to accept reality as it is, not as we would like it to be. The best we can do is hold our seat and ride out the storm remembering that this too shall pass.
5) Make a decision and don’t look back. No ‘what if’ing’, no self doubt, decision made. Full stop.

Have you had a FOMO moment? Please share your experiences!

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Tania Potter - Soul Sense Coaching

I'm a Personal Development Life Coach who specialises in L.I.F.E (Living Into your Fullest Expression). Based in Richards Bay, on the East Coast of South Africa, I live with my long-suffering husband, (his description!), two much-loved dogs and care for my elderly father who has Alzheimer's.

Read more about me here.

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Comments  

# Style & Life by Susa 2017-04-11 13:21
I think that despite your decision, you have done the right decision by you.Such an amazing and well written post. Love this!! xx

http://www.susanalopessnarey.com
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# Tania Potter - Soul Sense Coaching 2017-04-11 14:10
It was the right decision, we had a lovely day and I scored mega points with my husband!
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# behgopa 2017-03-24 23:13
There have been times of having FOMO moments. It made me wonder if I'd regret it later on. But so far, what I thought I'd regret hasn't caught on, fortunately.
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# Tania Potter - Soul Sense Coaching 2017-03-25 10:43
There you go, that shows you have been making some really good decisions. Well done!
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# diana 2017-03-24 20:42
FOMO moments man so many! a great post." Make a decision and don’t look back. No ‘what if’ing’, no self doubt, decision made. Full stop " i will write it down and make a fancy print of this and hang it on my wall. thanks a lot for this post, great insight
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# Tania Potter - Soul Sense Coaching 2017-03-25 10:41
Thanks Diana, your comment has brought a smile to my face!
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# GiGi 2017-03-21 20:36
I have tiny moments about FOMO but I get over it very quickly!
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# Tania Potter - Soul Sense Coaching 2017-03-25 10:40
Good for you! Lol, I'm still working on it....
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# Joanna 2017-03-17 16:53
I did plenty of FOMO moments and that's because I don't have too many friends. For me is very important to be social when I can and if I would have probably chosen the same as you.
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# Tania Potter - Soul Sense Coaching 2017-03-17 19:11
Friends really are important and even more precious when you don't have many. Well worth taking care of!
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# londonmumma 2017-03-17 16:24
This has happened to me so many times, but like you said be gratfeul that you are fortunate to have options in life!

Lindsey
http://www.londonmumma.com
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# Tania Potter - Soul Sense Coaching 2017-03-17 19:09
It is a blessing, isn't it!
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# Jenny Hall 2017-03-16 21:13
This post was very inspiring . I have been working a lot on gratitude. I love the phrase, "flex your gratitude muscle
"
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# Tania Potter - Soul Sense Coaching 2017-03-17 08:54
Thanks Jenny!
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# Ana Ojha 2017-03-16 18:34
Very inspiring post! I totally agree with you that one should not back out after taking any decision. Go for it no matter if you'll fail because there's always a next chance!
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# Tania Potter - Soul Sense Coaching 2017-03-16 19:05
Yeah, what she said! Love it.
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# Stylooo 2017-03-16 13:14
Great to read about FOMO, everyone face that moment and always experienced new things and learnt new lesson.
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# Tania Potter - Soul Sense Coaching 2017-03-16 19:05
That's the best part, isn't it, that there is always something to learn!
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# Claudia H. Blanton 2017-03-16 05:02
I thankfully have less FOMO moments the older I get. I am a planner type, and don't like to go for anything that requires brash instant decisions, that can lead to FOMO. But I do agree, that lifecoaching might help someone who has these moments often.

Blessings!
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# Tania Potter - Soul Sense Coaching 2017-03-16 05:52
I know what you mean about being a planner. Lol, I'm too much of a control freak to be able to stand too many FOMO moments.
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# Ali Rost 2017-03-16 03:48
What a great post. This has happened to me in so many different ways throughout my life. Lately it's been most notable with my blogging. If I don't write that extra post this week .. I'll miss out on reaching more people. If I don't participate in the comment thread I'll miss out on engagement. I'm getting better about recognizing it in the moment and stopping myself. Step away from the screen. Step away from the screen :)
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# Tania Potter - Soul Sense Coaching 2017-03-16 05:55
Oh my word! I never even thought of it in terms of blogging but yes, you are so right. My husband went for art classes and the instructor had a fabulous saying to stop them fiddling with their paintings. Put down your traditional weapon! In our case, step away from the screen is spot on!
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# ginger 2017-03-16 02:10
Oh yes, I have had a FOMO moment many times. I always second guess my decisions also. UGH! I want to go to a bridal shower, FOMO LOL I think we have all been there. Good choice to try new things! I'll stick with that advice!
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# Tania Potter - Soul Sense Coaching 2017-03-16 05:56
Lucky us having all these lovely options to choose from! But I do find the doubt hard at times, second guessing is my weakness as well.
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# Patrick 2017-03-16 01:58
That is another feeling/emotion that I no longer experience. I think the closest I come to feeling FOMO is seeing a new movie when it comes out. But after that first weekend,it vanishes and I just wait for the DVD to come out.
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# Tania Potter - Soul Sense Coaching 2017-03-16 06:12
There are so many phases in life and it sounds like you can tick the patience box, Patrick. If there is one quality I aspire to, it's patience.
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# Katie Kinsley 2017-03-16 00:25
I sometimes have fear of missing out, but I'm not a bored person. I always have something to do or I'm always planning something, so it is easy for me to say no to events.
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# Tania Potter - Soul Sense Coaching 2017-03-16 06:05
Good for you, Katie! It is such a divine feeling to be satisfied with your choices.
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# Kathy Myers 2017-03-15 23:14
I have done some fun crazy things this year, like Mardi Gras and Rodeos, I have decided we are going to have fun this year and so far we have!!
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# Tania Potter - Soul Sense Coaching 2017-03-16 06:00
I think I am having a FOMO moment just reading your comment! What a wonderful theme for the year and I hope it keeps getting better and better.
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# Isadora 2017-03-15 22:23
I know how it feel. Sometimes i spend more time thinking about which option I need to take than actually taking action in taking them. Sometimes it takes me so long that I ended up losing the posibility of taking any!

I think we complicate things!
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# Tania Potter - Soul Sense Coaching 2017-03-16 05:58
You have nailed it, Isadora, that's exactly how it goes! I should probably have a PHD in complication, I am sooo good at it.
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# Ana De- Jesus 2017-03-15 20:51
I think that despite your decision, you did the right thing. Flexing your gratitude muscles in situations that go awry can be extremely helpful to maintaining a positive frame of mind x
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# Tania Potter - Soul Sense Coaching 2017-03-16 06:01
Gratitude at least shifts you out of the missing out mind-state, which is a start, if nothing else, Ana.
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# Jacqueline 2017-03-15 17:42
I think people feel the complications of the world more than ever and that plays a large part in how we feel. Good advice for clarifying a path to happiness.
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# Tania Potter - Soul Sense Coaching 2017-03-16 06:03
Thanks Jacqueline. There are just so many more options available these days that it's easy to get caught up in the abundance and lose sight of what is important.
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